Homeless Guy to Digital Nomad? Private work space. Spiders in every nook. Takes money to make money. [2024-04-14]

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iSpoogeDaily
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Joined: Wed Jul 26, 2023 1:49 am

Homeless Guy to Digital Nomad? Private work space. Spiders in every nook. Takes money to make money. [2024-04-14]

Post by iSpoogeDaily »

Description

Dumping out my thoughts on homelessness and getting back to work as a professional. Where can I find privacy? Why do I give so much attention and thus energy to discussing parasites? They are existential threats. Not trying to get familiar and thus increase vulnerability to unvetted randos who feel like I'm in their living room; threatened by my presence, entitled to treat me as a guest in their space which is not their space.

Once I'm not homeless anymore someone else will have to make these videos. Get them while they're dropping. Can't wait for this to be over. Day 2,144 and counting.

Feel free to keep donating if you support what the channel is doing. But it's not urgent, by all means give it to someone in immediate need if you feel so called. Thanks.

Video



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngYwqSUFYSk

Transcript

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Yo, and welcome to the Ice Pooge Daily Channel.

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This is an experimental tech and media brand,

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and we're doing 20-minute daily videos.

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Unscripted, one-take, no-fake.

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Sometimes I have ideas about what I'm going to talk about.

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And the homeless guy explains,

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Rages this and that are the popular videos.

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Hopefully I won't be homeless for too long.

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But it's been six years, so it might be some more years still.

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I think it's a number of times that it's interesting

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that the way to get mentioned on my channel isn't by being kind,

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helpful, considered, all this stuff.

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I do mention those people,

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like the Venmo donors and whatnot.

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I haven't been checking out email lately,

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so if people have been donating still,

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that's awesome.

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Thank you so much.

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But I just keep noticing that the people who get extensive play

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are people not necessarily online,

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but physically close by narcissists.

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Narcissistic abuse, these kind of situations.

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The bomb fights, the relative, you know,

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the bosses, all this and that, this mistreatment.

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And I don't really have many interactions

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that are positive with people.

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Even day-to-day courtesy is very rare.

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But it's just interesting that I mentioned the mistreatment still.

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Like I really shouldn't mention it at all,

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because where your attention goes energy flows sort of thing.

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And I don't want to see more of that in the world.

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I want to see less.

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I'm not sure what to say because I'm in a very unique situation.

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That's part of why I'm talking about it.

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So consistently, even though I met the goal of ten videos last month,

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because I won't be homeless for very long.

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I'm here in this situation.

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Oh God.

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I'm an optimist, big time.

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So homelessness is not having a choice,

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so I anticipate after my third paycheck at this job, which is coming.

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Not too soon, but not too far away.

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I won't have to call myself homeless anymore.

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It'll mean I could find another option.

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It could be, you know, I've now got three paystubs,

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so maybe I can rent a room.

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Maybe I can get a lease for a van.

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Maybe I can get a line of credit secured with something as collateral.

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I don't know if I need paystubs necessarily for that,

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but it might not hurt to have both income and collateral.

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I don't like the idea of borrowing to get into a place.

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If it was a van, maybe,

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but really getting into a place,

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not being in a place is the main thing stopping me from making money.

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I think that in luck.

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But I've offered my freelance services,

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and even if someone were to email me,

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there'd be some kind of setup period to be able to render the services.

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I then get paid.

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Like, where do I render the services in a motel room?

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What if I can only afford a day or two in a motel room?

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And it takes five or six days to do the service.

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A coworking space.

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It feels like a good step.

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Some good breathing room, a good alternative to Starbucks.

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But I do want a door that can close.

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I do want a private space.

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Even if it is a non-public,

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member only kind of space.

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I just don't like getting two familiar with people.

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The guy who is camping basically outside the library.

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It's his home in a sense.

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And I don't feel guilty.

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So there's a difference between approaching the car

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and making comments about,

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oh, privacy is not a stutter dot,

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or like talking about my plants,

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or something.

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It's like literally way to intimate and private for somebody

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to like come up to someone's living room

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and look in and start commenting on the plants and stuff isn't it?

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But when someone approaches my car, that's what they're doing.

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It may not feel like it.

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Everybody outside.

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But that's what's happening.

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Other people who live in a vehicle

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should have that level of empathy or sympathy.

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But if they camp at the library,

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they feel like it is their home.

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So they actually would be projecting the opposite

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as narcissistic people do.

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Well, I'm invading their private space

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by parking anywhere in the parking lot,

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and so they can come in.

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You know, I'm already in their private space,

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so tick for tat.

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No, this is a library parking lot, nobody.

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I've literally heard this guy have fights with people,

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bomb fights over territory,

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and I just want nothing to do with that,

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and I recognized right away the narcissistic behaviors.

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And there was a lot of bomb that came after that.

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So this isn't supposed to be a drama channel with characters,

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but when there's like one library in 10 miles,

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one spot where I can use free internet,

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or any homeless person can use free internet.

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And then there's somebody camping out in the parking lot,

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like acting like it's their living room.

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Super not cool.

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I did a poll, I didn't get many votes, but it got one vote

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and the person said that hanging out in the library parking lot

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for not too long might technically be loitering,

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but it's okay.

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So I come here for maybe just a little bit,

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but it's okay.

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So I come here for,

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maybe just a little bit,

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but it's okay.

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So I come here for maybe just a little bit,

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okay.

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So I come here for maybe two hours, maybe three hours,

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maybe two times for one to two hours in a day,

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in the morning and in the evening,

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but I don't sleep here ever.

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Yeah, I don't get comfortable,

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I don't do hygiene things,

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I don't vacuum out the car,

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like I don't do anything like that in the parking lot.

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I just come here,

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do internet related things and leave.

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So, yeah, I mean, why do I not talk about,

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you know,

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people who donated to the channel in that much detail,

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why aren't I responding to their emails

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and getting to know them and sharing their business

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or something like that,

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like helping drive business to them,

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they're off sharing their offers, things like that.

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It's said,

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you know,

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if someone, you know, the enemy of my enemy is my friend,

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like,

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if someone were to like try to deanonymize where I am

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and like try to go find this person who I'm talking about,

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try to figure out where I work and try to deanonymize

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and find these narcissistic people who I mentioned,

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you know,

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never by name,

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but somebody could reverse engineer

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and find that and be like my enemy's enemy is my friend.

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So, yeah,

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super not cool.

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I took a few different notes about things I could talk about in here,

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but it's not part of my review process yet,

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so that is something I would like to talk about more on the channel,

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is, you know,

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back to the roots of all the tech stuff that I used to do.

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One thing that has me almost not uploading a video today,

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so,

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like,

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I'm in the library parking lot,

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I could be approached at any time,

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but also just,

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like,

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thinking about getting a coworking space,

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you know,

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I just don't want to get that familiar with people in public,

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especially while I'm this week,

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I want to have a private space,

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and I want going into public to be a choice,

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not getting my basic needs met.

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Like, I should be able to do everything at home,

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but come into public voluntarily when I want to.

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When I do,

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then not have it feel like I'm in someone's living room,

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like at the park,

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at the library,

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like pretty much anywhere in public,

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where someone can find solitude,

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or rest,

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or peace.

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Someone lives there,

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like,

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that's claimed as someone's living room.

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And they're going to feel entitled to the space,

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like,

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but then at work,

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you know,

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I've got my work,

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I'm not even entitled to that space.

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You know,

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other people are coming and going,

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laying dishes,

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and this isn't a complaint about that at all.

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It's my job to fix it,

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to clean stuff.

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But,

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I don't have private space,

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even within,

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like, a private kitchen.

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Like,

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how nice would it be

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to just go home and have a kitchen?

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And when I say a kitchen before,

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I'm saying,

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since I work at a kitchen,

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I don't have private space in the kitchen,

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even in the dish pit.

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It's so nice that it's raining out,

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but then,

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it's like I know that within,

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you know,

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there's electronic electromagnetic fields around the body.

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That can be detected,

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like,

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10, 12 feet away.

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So it's like,

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if me and another parasite,

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an narcissistic type person,

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are,

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if I'm a son,

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you may think energy,

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and they're a black hole sucking energy,

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like,

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it's just not a good feeling to even be,

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within their proximity.

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And probably every space is going to have one of these parasites,

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like,

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this spider waiting for flies.

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Like,

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if you've seen,

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if you've been on a hike,

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on a trail,

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we're not a lot of people walk,

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but like,

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there's a stream crossing.

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You'll see there's tons of spiders camped out,

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along that path.

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It's like bugs,

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probably fly along these trails.

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Because it's like low ground,

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low to the ground,

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protected by wind,

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this and that,

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like it's a nice natural feature to the bugs,

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and then the spiders are all set up,

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like,

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over the streams in that situation.

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So it's interesting that they're set up specifically

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at the intersection of the stream and the trail.

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I'm not sure,

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if the bugs fly along the streams or the trails are both,

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but yeah,

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that's where all the spiders set up their camp.

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And so that's how pretty much every space that's too accessible,

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too open,

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too low of a bar for entry,

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too low of a barrier to entry,

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that doesn't keep the riff riff out like,

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one thing that's pretty nice about the restaurant that I work at,

261
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:34,000
it's a restaurant in bar,

262
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:39,000
but it's expensive enough that riff riff customers don't go in.

263
00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:47,000
Yeah, I mean, I'm really lucky.

264
00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:50,000
So another thing is gratitude.

265
00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:53,000
I've, you know, expressed that I know,

266
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:56,000
I need to feel more gratitude,

267
00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:57,000
but really,

268
00:13:57,000 --> 00:14:02,000
I do feel gratitude like every morning when I wake up,

269
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:05,000
when I eat, when I drink water,

270
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:10,000
but other than that,

271
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,000
like,

272
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:12,000
I never know how much money I have.

273
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,000
I like to not know how much money I have.

274
00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:16,000
I like to just feel like I have enough,

275
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:19,000
and that things will work.

276
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:23,000
And in a way that'll be my gauge for when I'm not homeless anymore,

277
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:27,000
like when I'm not worried about using my card.

278
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,000
Right now,

279
00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:31,000
I'm still apprehensive about doing my laundry,

280
00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:34,000
or going to Taco Bell, or even grocery shopping.

281
00:14:34,000 --> 00:14:37,000
Because I just had three bills that I had to pay.

282
00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:39,000
And,

283
00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:44,000
you know, I'll be paid again in a while.

284
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:48,000
And,

285
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:49,000
like, in a way,

286
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:52,000
I'd rather not know that I have 60 bucks,

287
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:56,000
than know that I have 100 bucks, for example.

288
00:14:56,000 --> 00:14:58,000
Because,

289
00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,000
at least, if I don't know,

290
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:03,000
I'm spending normally and not like cutting back,

291
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:07,000
trying to make the 60 bucks last a few days,

292
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:10,000
or the 100 bucks last a few days.

293
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:12,000
But I just spend,

294
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:13,000
you know,

295
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:14,000
whatever my normal is,

296
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,000
10 or 12 dollars a day,

297
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:16,000
for four of the days,

298
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:17,000
and then on the fifth day,

299
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,000
I find out I'm out of money.

300
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:20,000
Maybe,

301
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,000
or maybe,

302
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:22,000
at that point,

303
00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:23,000
donations come in,

304
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:25,000
and I'm checking my emails.

305
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:27,000
I don't know.

306
00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:29,000
But, yeah.

307
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:32,000
Once I don't have to call myself homeless anymore,

308
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:34,000
what are the choices?

309
00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:38,000
I think I will make is...

310
00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:43,000
See,

311
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:47,000
I was pretty much not for tinting my windows for a long time,

312
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:49,000
but now that,

313
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,000
you know,

314
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,000
in the last week or two,

315
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:54,000
this new parasite's been hanging out at

316
00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:58,000
the library spot where I used to park.

317
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:00,000
Every day,

318
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:02,000
now I feel like,

319
00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:04,000
it's in my blind spot right now,

320
00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:06,000
so I'd have to keep looking back,

321
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:07,000
keep looking back like a creeper,

322
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,000
and I don't want to.

323
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:11,000
But they could just be staring at me for all I know,

324
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:12,000
I don't know.

325
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,000
But, yeah,

326
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:18,000
having a van would be nice,

327
00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:20,000
because then I could just be like,

328
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:21,000
in their stealth,

329
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,000
nobody could see me,

330
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:25,000
and it also would not be like,

331
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:28,000
a dusty car with tinted windows.

332
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,000
It's a mismatch,

333
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:33,000
like once I can detail the outside of my car,

334
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,000
so it looks nice and shiny,

335
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:37,000
maybe it gets maybe pull some dents.

336
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,000
It'll be a nice looking car

337
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:43,000
that tinted windows are fitting,

338
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:46,000
not like a suspicious looking car with some dents,

339
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:49,000
that's all dusty with brand new tinted windows,

340
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:50,000
like,

341
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:53,000
what are they doing in there?

342
00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:54,000
Anyway,

343
00:16:54,000 --> 00:17:00,000
so that could give me a little bit more privacy.

344
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:04,000
It won't stop the noise from propagating out

345
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,000
and the electromagnetic waves

346
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:11,000
of being in someone's aura and things like that.

347
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,000
But yeah,

348
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:18,000
I gotta figure out how to put more attention

349
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:25,000
on this energy into things that deserve it,

350
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:26,000
you know,

351
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:28,000
be thankful for more things.

352
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,000
Highlight things,

353
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,000
you know,

354
00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:34,000
find ways to give value back

355
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:37,000
to people who have given me donations

356
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:39,000
and things like that.

357
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:44,000
I'm just in this period of waiting,

358
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:46,000
and it's like my life is taking by day

359
00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:47,000
after day.

360
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,000
You know,

361
00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:49,000
I was thinking about how many days

362
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:50,000
have I been homeless?

363
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:52,000
Number of days?

364
00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:55,000
Since June 1st,

365
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,000
2018.

366
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:04,000
This is...

367
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:10,000
Number of is not working.

368
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:12,000
Day is since.

369
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:19,000
Oh.

370
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:26,000
I used to just show it on here.

371
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:28,000
Yeah.

372
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:45,000
2,144 days.

373
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:47,000
So I was in the car straight up

374
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:48,000
for the first thousand.

375
00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:52,000
And then we tried some other options during COVID.

376
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:56,000
And oh,

377
00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:58,000
I'm allowed to say that word.

378
00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:02,000
So we've got about one minute left,

379
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,000
smacks.

380
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:07,000
Thanks for all the support of the channel.

381
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,000
If you've emailed me,

382
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:10,000
thanks a lot for that.

383
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:13,000
I'll get to it in due time.

384
00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:16,000
And if you've been coming back

385
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:18,000
and everything,

386
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:19,000
thanks a lot.

387
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:21,000
I appreciate it.

388
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:23,000
And yeah,

389
00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:26,000
I look forward to how the channel evolves

390
00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:28,000
and hopefully,

391
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,000
you know,

392
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,000
you're getting something out of these videos

393
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:33,000
somewhat regularly.

394
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:34,000
I don't know.

395
00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:37,000
I was feel 100% on board with

396
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:38,000
recording and stuff,

397
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,000
but they always get done.

398
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,000
So thanks a lot for joining

399
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:45,000
and looking forward to seeing you next time.

400
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:46,000
Thanks.

401
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:47,000
Bye.



Appendix

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